ILL-ECTRIC

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 04:35:00 GMT

spent today taking photographs of little soccer kids for seven hours. My legs are SHOT. Once they started aching on the field I hadn't realized how strenuous an activity I was partaking in.

We drove up to Eureka last night, spent the night in a hotel, I took a walk to get high and couldn't fall asleep for hoouuuurs. The hotel was comfortable enough. It was beautiful up there. I slept most of the way up and virtually all of the way down.

Five hour drive. I'll be getting paid $300 for all this. Not bad for a fun weekend with Saturday to spare.

No one's home right now. Shandon's in Fresno and Ryan's in Sacramento.

I've got the sweetest ass roommate setup.

Also I'm not horribly miserable. This whole thing with James is crazy, but the more I've been talking to him after the fact the better I feel.

He's not a bad dude, he didn't fuck me over, he is just at a point where he can't really handle all of this. What occurs between him and myself is serious "I could do this for a good long time" type shit. That's why it hurts most, I guess. I just want it now. I think I can wait. But I'm forgetful, so let's hope that doesn't end badly. Or rather, not end or anything, just going on in time with nothing ever happening. I wouldn't like that very much.

It still makes me feel weird, though. I don't know. It's still rough, and it still hurts.

Anyway.
whatever.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Thu, 23 Aug 2007 20:48:49 GMT

huge amounts of disappointment (all directed at myself of course)

no self-esteem to speak of

damn.

It got hard again.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 20:11:05 GMT

explanation for the prior post:

I am SICK. My head feels stuffed, I've got a sinus headache. so much pressure right behind my nose, ouch ouch ouch

My throat is sore and if I lay for too long it gets all mucus-y and boy do I sound weird.

My belly HURTS and oh boy it is not fun at all.

I cannot have a long distance relationship with a boy I am absolutely enamored, infatuated, smitten, taken with. Since it was ultimately his decision it is hard for me to remember that he is absolutely enamored, infatuated, smitten, and taken with me.

But he is! he is he is. I am pretty sure he is, at least.

It's a sort of background lethargic sadness I've got now. I can't treat it like a break-up, I can't get angry or depressed. The reasons are valid and reasonable.

I AM JUST SO DANG SCARED!

Does this mean I am not a goal anymore?
Does this mean that any little lady can come along and take him away?
Does this mean that it's possible he'll stop pining?
Does this mean that it's even less likely I'll get to see him?
Will he just forget?
Will I?

my skin rushed and pulled pulsing through my rivery veins that when pierced turned me pale
I wanted to sing, fall over sing breath songs that you could understand even though they never came from my mouth.

I mean, he prefaced all of this with how he hadn't experienced all these things like the comfort and the lust and et cetera at the level at which he was experiencing them with me. And I already went through a retarded point at which I was hearing what he was saying to me about me and how he felt and was still scared when I stupidly got paranoid that his absence was an attempt to move away.

Jesus, I'd even move to Austin, now.

I miss him something terrible.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Wed, 18 Jul 2007 06:22:25 GMT

Hey folks. Anyone who reads their friends list, at least.

What's been up?

Good? Yeah?

Yeah, things have been pretty awesome.

I'm going to Comic-Con at the end of the month.

There is a giant cat trying to get up on my bed. It took him literally about a minute to sit there and shift his weight a bunch of times and calculate his trajectory for his foot and a half jump.

There is a tiny kitten floating over the head of my bed.

I cut my hair, a lot. It looks weird. It looked great when I first did it. That's because I would put the hair on the sides over the horribly short bangs. That only lasted a day.

There are moths and flies flying up the window, and the kitten is scratching the glass until he can't reach anymore.

I have a little plant that I kept alive to fruition. His berries are black. They're gorgeous. This little plant I bought had all sorts of stuff sprout up when all the flowers I picked and left inside them decomposed in the little container. His little flowers were tiny white stars.

I have a boy that I like a lot.

I wish I could explain to you what that means better than I've tried to explain to him.

At work there is a metal partition that I rest on. When I ever put my hand on the one in front of it, I start feeling a buzz in my arm. That is how I feel when he is near me.

He can jolt me back to life. He makes me feel so damn good about everything. He's ruined me for other men. Every insecurity I've had (and I've had so many) he dissolves like they are poprocks. He'll just say a thing and I am all better. Our minds have got a good, interesting connection. Our bodies gravitate towards each other.

Life is so good.

He lives far away and I miss him a lot. He may move further, I don't know. I haven't gotten to talk to him much the past couple days. He said something that just cleared up all the insecurities that incited. That may not sound like much, but I've never been so comfortable in my life.

Way to go, me!

He also made that one website, sorryeverybody.com. He's an e-lebrity! e-larious!

Here is my haircut:

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Fri, 08 Jun 2007 22:14:02 GMT

I've come to believe from everything I've been reading and paying attention to these last few months that these problems never would have come about if we hadn't lost our connections with nature. Right now we're so detached from the nutrient flows that keep us alive. We don't see or touch the food we eat until we find it on a shelf and chop it up on our kitchen counters. This also has to do with our absolute dependence on oil. The amount of energy required to sustain our current infrastructure is mind-boggling, and it's all because it's done behind the scenes, allowing companies to flourish under the guise of convenience at the cost of biodiversity, ecological equilibrium, and of humans' abilities to think for themselves.

I can't even finish this, there's just so fucking much I want to say.

Ban advertising!
Stop subsidizing corn!
Stop washing away topsoil while drenching our food in petrochemicals!
No more suburban Sprawl! (Way to fucking go, California!)
Restructure wastewater systems! So fucking much water goes down the drains that shouldn't.
Make gentler soaps and detergents!

There's way too much.

God everyone, please, wake up to what's happening around you! Everyone is so complacent and expects so much of their surroundings and are willing to give very little, it seems. I don't want to believe that's the case, as cynical as I usually am.

Everyone read Cradle to Cradle, Ecological Design, Field Notes from a Catastrophe, and Design by Nature.

They are eye-opening books that express very well what we have done to get to this point (design by nature), what the real consequences have been from these causes we've made (Field notes) and give a hopeful nearly play-by-play instructions on common-sense steps towards true sustainability. But I would actually read them in the order I listed them up there.

They certainly opened my and my housemate's eyes. We've become like those young folks in the '60s and '70s who want to learn to be closer to the land and move out to a rural area and learn to become self-sufficient. We plan to do this while living in Arcata or Eureka and going to Humboldt State. I figure once I'll learn exactly how to change the world, I'll do it. Move back to civilization, equipped with the knowledge that I am not a slave to the infrastucture and then I'll do what I can to make the infrastructure something I'd want to be a part of.

That's my goal, I guess.

There is just so much that is wrong with the world.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Tue, 29 May 2007 09:44:25 GMT

my list of tattoos:

"I'll keep them still" written in an attractive but not too gaudy script somewhere
BRONTOSAUR
TYRANNOSAUR

whale from roommate pip's boardgame

so weird, things are so weird.

They've calmed down significantly, though.

weird.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Mon, 12 Feb 2007 07:52:56 GMT

If cupid were three inches tall, he'd use a bow I made and an arrow John made. We are masters:

Guys seriously that paperclip is the kind that is about an inch and a half when in shape. WE ROCK.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Mon, 12 Feb 2007 07:01:26 GMT

It's when I get this weird jealousy about other peoples' lives being more interesting. I fear complacency so much. It's like an alarm that goes off inside of me that knows I need to get out of this situation. To something "better". Unfortunately, there's no real validity to the idea of better because for me it just means anything that isn't what I'm doing. This is the biggest test of whether or not I can see with a long-term perspective. My life is not merely punctuated by situations, they litter the sentences like consonants. Every other week is a whole new version of the same situation, or an entirely new one itself. Everything changes around me to a scarifying degree! I can't keep the same ideas in my head on a day to day basis, and I constantly re-analyze, so my awe and fear of the situation is being constantly refreshed. Nothing is ever settled in my head.

I think this is really why I feel like the last few weeks have been going by so quickly. Things are settling down in one way and picking up in another. I can't focus on the settling down, it almost doesn't exist, and those are the times that stretch out the day. Without those all I am is rushing all the time. Recall just skips over it.

Sometimes I just want to be able to not be thinking about something at any given moment. I think that's why I've been smoking so much weed lately. I can actually focus on things that are okay, instead of magnifying extremely negative things in my head.

It's like the difference between a cut on your knee and watching the microscopic bacteria fester on the wound in real time. Don't get me wrong though, festering bacteria's not always terrible. I guess fester just kind of has a negative connotation.

Anyway, now I can focus entirely on something absolutely wonderful, like art or photos or music. Most of my analysis goes to that. And even now when it's trained inwardly it does more good than harm. I was kind of fighting with it earlier but not feeling like crap kind of won out over feeling like crap. That's pretty awesome.

I have realized some things about myself that I am not particularly pleased about, though. For instance, I have just realized that the kind of validation I give myself while out and about is based on people wondering about me. Anything, really. Not so much a marked interest such as dudes wantin' to bone, just maybe someone wondering anything as inane as where I got my stockings or what my daily life is like. It's a different sort of arrogance than just wanting to be hot. Wanting to be interesting or worth wondering about, or really being presumptuous enough to think you are, seems as though it's based more in wanting to seem cooler than I feel my life has been thus far.

It's funny because what I really want with another person is for them to not only be okay with how I can get but to nurture it as well. I really have shown a lot to someone like Jack, for whom it was almost all he got to see of me. But at the same time I don't think that that was at peak. Especially since toward the end I got really self-conscious. Around Ryan, though, the one from San Diego who's been visiting, he's likened me to a retarded child, and I still feel completely comfortable being around him. Lately on the train I just want to whoop with sung tongs amd shout and clap my hands whenever appropriate. And I bet if I started singing that with Ryan he'd just sing along. We are silly kids saying silly things because words can be fun just as their meanings can be, and when you let both get together and have a party, it just gets crazy in your head. Good crazy, though.

well shucks. someone came online, now I'm focusing on their conversation. It's a little crazy. I'm trying to convince my friend patrick to go to south america for a while instead of san francisco and denver.

And now a picture. I love you, San Francisco. Let's just love each other, alright?

Same fucking window, different visual.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Sat, 13 Jan 2007 04:14:01 GMT

There is no reason in my life anymore! Logic stopped existing! I subsist on infeasible desires and irrational decisions!

Wait, is it un- or infeasible?

I'm getting my hair cut soon.

I have gotten an offhand unprofessional diagnosis of manic depression, or bipolar II disorder. It may very well be true. Less manic, more hypomanic.

I spend the times I am not ridiculously happy sobbing violently alone in my room.

Poor Jack. There can't be anything more between us. His decision, not mine!

I'm living in a mental minefield right now. Explosions left and right! This was where the enemy was supposed to have gotten to full force to wreak the most damage, but nowadays it's all civilians and innocents lost in the fire of a war that wasn't theirs to suffer from.

I've been a big huge mess. You guys have no idea. I've got knots knots knots in my chest all the time and I've been losing weight.

I'm not meant for sustained happiness. I am good at just ruining it.

Also, so much Aesop Rock and Daedalus' Exquisite Corpse album. OH SO MUCH.

I'm not unhappy right now so all of this seems weird to talk about.

Also maybe doomed romantically? Always the dang ol' same thing.

HEY GUYS

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Wed, 03 Jan 2007 10:03:49 GMT

YEAH GUYS HEY, WHY DON'T WE TALK ABOUT THINGS LIKE PAPER TOWELS GROWING LIKE A TREE.

How about something like how the rings around the paper towel are always increasing, you can count them and tell how many weeks old it is. I hope it is some short amount of time like a week because if it took years to become as thick as it is it would be as sad to chop it down! There is history in the rings of a paper towel! This towel was around to see the civil war! See! That would be sad.

Paper towel harvests! this is an easy scheme for making money, I am all for it.

I am your nigerian scammer, with a solid gold investment pitch:

I already have the fields sown, all you have to do is reap the profits of: PAPER TOWEL HARVESTING.

Now give me your bank account numbers so I can forward you from my swiss bank account the starting cash required to greenlight this lucrative operation.

Twenty years later, paper towel logging has ruined the beautiful natural ecosystems in many regions of the world. Attempting to wean both industry and consumer off the depencency on natural resources, ecologists and materials scientists are working together in finding ecologically and economically friendly alternatives to the now rare paper towel. Unfortunately the pulling out of the paper towel logging industry is toppling economy after economy as small towns the world over feel the downsides of ecological awareness and the real impact it has on communities.

Anyway, I love cute overload.

I am living in a house full of interesting fun people.

I have a few close friends with whom I can talk.

There are new endeavours being undertaken as we speak. Secret missions and willingness and things like that!

Espionage! Talking with hands! Hearing with our eyes! New subjects of study for us to conquer. Life is full of schedules and things happening. Waves have the ability to crush you under their force, or you can ride them! I am going to learn how to surf as well, but only within the context of this metaphor!

You guys, my emotions are what make up the ground under Mexico City. It liquefies during an earthquake. But guess what! There are so many people that live and work their different lives in that city.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Sun, 31 Dec 2006 03:25:04 GMT

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Wed, 29 Nov 2006 03:57:59 GMT

You know what sucks?

my mom's best friend died last night. Her husband died about two months before.

My family has so much to owe to them and so far to go before we can feel guiltless.

We aren't guiltless, why should we get too feel that way?

The woman who watched me all the time when I was really little led a sad life and then died.

I can't handle other people's pain because I feel like I am drowning in it. Everything makes me depressed because other peoples' sadness is like an airborne tablet being dropped into a cup of water. Concentrated vitamins blooming in my brain, giant bubbles of emotion popping and leaving residue. Imagine tiny bubbles behind your eyes. They make it so you kind of can't see anymore.

I feel disappointed in myself and every surrounding circumstance. I'm getting so frustrated in my life that I'm lashing out at Ryan because I am getting annoyed at how opposite our attitudes are. The slightest of actions and tones made by him underline his selfishness and with him I cannot be accomodating and look past them as I do with most people. I just get angry. And I feel like he's done a big part in staining what would be an otherwise totally fucking awesome friendship with Gabe. I didn't want to have to choose. I didn't even get a choice! At no point did I want this. I'm tired of it, I want to drop from everyone's radar, but in that case I might as well move back to San Diego. The self-loathing and loneliness would still be there while the rent and shitty shitty workplace would disappear.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Sun, 12 Nov 2006 12:15:21 GMT

FACT: Life is still really fucking awesome.

The best thing about being constantly awed by the mundane is that my amazement at the fact that I made it up here and have been successful thus far has not yet waned.

Life is god damn awesome, all the dang time. Even when it's weird and hard, it retains its awesome.

I ate with Gabe at the restaurant she works at. Do you understand how lucky I am to not only have so awesome a person as a friend but also as a housemate? She is not only great to spend time with and talk to and have fun with, but my god is she a wonderful cook, both savory and sweet.

A long time ago I thought I would at some point be moving in with Angela, and I was all "oh man, livin' with a chef! Life will be awesome!" Even my okcupid profile still says it, though it's gone from "I'm going to be moving in with a chef" to "My hope is to move in with one". MISSION A-FUCKING-CCOMPLISHED. But the best part is that it isn't all that is awesome about her, not near it in the least.

It just feels like "count your blessings" time, so I guess I will. Dude you guys I have the awesomest house in the world. It's big and it's got a fucking fireplace and skylights everywhere and at night you all get up to go to the bathroom and you walk through the giant walk-in closet with wood floorboards and while you're peeing can hear the rain tapping at the skylight and you feel all happy that the heater works as well as it does. And the kitchen is yours and the living room is yours and everything else in the world seems like it's yours. But it's not just yours, it's your close friend Gabe's as well, and the two of you use it all for cooking adventures and movie-watching adventures and really late nights sitting on floors and chairs talking for a long time.

And then sometimes you get calls from other people wanting to hang out and that is damn well awesome as well. What's fun is hanging out with Ryan and listening to his ideas trying to help play a part in the execution of them. And I guess his friend Jack will be in by next month and I have heard that they together will be unstoppable and Ryan is sure that I would have my place. I may very well not and I am okay with that, but it sounds at the very least interesting and enriching. And then before his phone broke texts and calls from Omar, with whom I could have some of the more wonderful experiences around town, with him as a guide for my entirely unexperienced eyes. He's helping so much to make me feel like this is my city. It's not completely like that yet, but soon we'll see. I'm wrapping my head around it slowly, but my head is ever-malleable and stretchy. Just takes some time!

And god damn Jon for lending me the Fables books, since they are what have me up at 4am typing on here. Every social circle should dream of having him as a pillar! Ahh, the generosity! Ahh the... oh man I was just looking for a better word than "evenhandedness" so I peruse the good ol' thesaurus.com and basically, take a look at this: http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/evenhandedness Every single one of those is ridiculously applicable to Jon, basically. Ridiculously so.

And Sham! I haven't had much of a chance to spend time with her, and that I feel so crap about! She had one of the biggest hands in getting me up here in the first place! It's amazing how much one little show of generosity and one initial set of open arms can help so much in my achieving something so huge to me. She's wonderful and I am ever-so-glad that she is finally essentially at my fingertips, I just need to utilize this fact much more often!

And god damn, The Definite Articles are MOST DEFINITELY a great reason why life is so awesome. What the fuck guys, DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW GOOD THE MUSIC YOU MAKE IS?! SERIOUSLY, DO YOU? BECAUSE I AM WILLING TO LET YOU KNOW: IT IS REALLY REALLY FUCKING GOOD. I MEAN, REALLY.

God damn. That is not even ALL, you guys. There is so much more to every day life that makes living here so fucking wonderful. It all even makes up for creepy gangsters following me around on my lunchbreaks! AND I SAY THIS WITHOUT SARCASM, OF COURSE!!! Life is awesome and I have never been as justified in saying this as I am at this moment, and I highly doubt that the justification will do anything but grow exponentially.

Life is god damn awesome.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Fri, 03 Nov 2006 21:10:22 GMT

First rain of the season spent on the beach sitting on my jacket with a soft rain touching my arms, it was magnificent.

Life is pretty okay.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Tue, 24 Oct 2006 22:58:40 GMT

I woke up at a place that come the 1st I will be paying rent for.

I guess that means that for the first time in a little under a month, I woke up at home. Funny! It's easy to acclimate to this.

I had the biggest craving for deviled eggs. After Gabe went to work I was going to get up and pick up some food! Also copy a house key! But I napped instead, and it was glorious. I napped and I woke up alert and awake. Crazy! When was the last time that happened?

But I am still going to go pick up food. I finally remembered the name for the japanese mustard that makes my deviled eggs supreme. I want some god-damn karashi. I'm only in Hella Asian City, this shouldn't be too hard.

Thank you, internet, for laying in my lap everything I could ever need. From fucking wonderful friends to a god-damn apartment to the location of surrounding safeways, you have made my life infinitely easier and awesome.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Mon, 23 Oct 2006 01:40:29 GMT

I have hell of cash and I bought two expensive ass dresses that are totally awesome.

There is still that pendulum swing between low self-esteem and elation and I feel bad for missing my gangly Ryan.

I am going to be moving into Gabe's house soon since on the 1st I will be paying rent.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Sun, 22 Oct 2006 09:16:45 GMT

I've discovered that there is no such thing as weekdays in San Francisco.

I am out whatever got damn night I happen to be out. What?

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Sat, 21 Oct 2006 04:58:55 GMT

I'm swinging like a monkey between exhilaration and pretty intense depression.

I think I've got a place to stay come november. It's actually my friend Gabe's old room in a pretty big house, with a fireplace and a washing machine and a huge closet and awesome kitchen. I've got much more than enough for the move-in costs. Enough that with the right planning I'll be going to Japan come spring with my mother.

Fuck yes.

In the meantime, I'm becoming more and more unhappy with myself and my self-esteem is just getting lower and lower. One girl actually said something to the effect of "you can't be saying that you have a hard time finding guys!" more or less unprovoked, and man. That sucked.

Maybe I should start coming on to the many homeless people around here. I doubt I'd be turned down. Way to go me.

I am going to go drink a bunch of nyquil and cry into someone else's pillow.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Mon, 09 Oct 2006 16:30:36 GMT

Hello people.

Things are strange and wonderful.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Tue, 20 Jun 2006 03:47:45 GMT

Notice anything different?

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Tue, 11 Apr 2006 00:47:24 GMT

So my dad has freaked out about his pictures all being gone and has blamed it on the family. He locked us all out of the computer. Fucking ridiculous.

But I know his password.

Anyway, I hung out with some kids last night, Tony, Fernando, and two of Tony's friends. Shot one roll, will develop asap.

His friend (Evan? Evyn? I am not sure) was interesting. He is younger but not by much, and he has the same cut of pants as Fernando which I find funny. He didn't have jowls, but a round jawline. He is one of those jokesters but it is like he is right out of the fifties. He can get obnoxious at times, but he was very sweet to me, and he told Tony I want to hike with them next time they go to Julian. He is taller than me. He is not ideal, but what does that really mean to me? I don't actually use these ideas of what I am attracted to as standards or limitations to whom I would date. He has a nice singing voice and hates pretension even though he thinks there are no good newer movies.

I will probably seem him twice more in the next three months and then never again.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Tue, 21 Feb 2006 18:07:22 GMT

Sometimes these test things freak me out..

"you are the most prone to sudden, ferocious crushes. Your results indicate that you're especially capable of obsessing over a guy you just met. Obviously, passion like this makes for an intense existence. It can also make for soul-destroying letdowns."

Oh man, is that ever the truth. As well as:

"Your ideal match is someone who'll love you back with equal fire, and someone you've grown to love slowly."

I figured that out a while ago, unfortunately I haven't had much of a chance to find out.

Then again there is: "Though you're drawn to them, avoid artists at all costs."

What-effin'-ever.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Wed, 21 Sep 2005 04:08:43 GMT

This is Amber updating for Mojo. She would be updating for herself but she is in the hospital. She has to stay overnight and they had to put an IV in her. She has an ulcer and internal bleeding going on. So just like pray for her and hope that everything turns out well and she makes a quick recovery. Thank you.

P.S you should leave her lots of comments to read when she gets home so that she knows you were thinking about her and that you love her. Awww. haha DO IT.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Wed, 06 Jul 2005 05:51:47 GMT

oh man. This past week has been crazy. And busy

Last Wednesday, I went with Hallie and Amber to Mt. Helix. It was beautiful. We took nerdy pictures.

Thursday, we went to the Whaley House, and then to the drive-in to see War of the Worlds and The Longest Yard. Amber, Hallie and I went to the Whaley House and met Rachelle there. One of the guys that work there was quite nice. QUITE nice. Looking, that is. The Whaley House is a haunted house (One of the most haunted, or something like that), and Rachelle ended up feeling something rubbing against her legs. We watched this curtain swing like a pendulum in a room that was completely still. We'd make a comment and it would billow out really high. It was crazy. There were so many stories we heard about it. Like one of the Whaley daughters killed herself because her husband left her, and now when attractive guys go she will touch them. The people that work there change in the room that is hidden by the curtain that moves. While it seems to move without air, they will be changing into heavy dresses and the curtain doesn't budge a centimeter, as if it's being held down. Sometimes they've heard heavy breathing right outside the curtain, or someone coughing even though the house is closed and no one else is inside. Once one woman had closed and had changed into her clothes, and then left the dressing room, and as soon as she closed the door someone was knocking from the inside. Anyway, from there we went to the drive-in and watched War of the Worlds, which I liked the whole extermination scenario and the really good CG. The Longest Yard had its good points, too. Fernando and Jenny met us there and it was an all-around good time.

Friday was supposed to be a girl's night out, but it ended up being a bowling night since Jessica couldn't go to the GNO. It ended up being the best time I've had going to one of those in a very very long time. Everybody theorizes that it's because of Ivan's absence. It was just great, everyone was there, Justin, Heather, Ethan, Jaimie, her friend Ashley, Courtney and some of her friends, Rachelle, Nick, Jesse, and Ben. Both Amber and Jaimie not only got over 100 for the first time, but they each did it twice! Go them. Nick and Rachelle kept trying to kick each others asses, and Nick hurt me quite a bit. My hands were bright pink for hours afterward. Fun fun fun!

on Saturday the day started with Me, Amber, Ashley, Jaimie, and Chelsea heading to the beach around 11 to find a spot for Rachelle's going-away party. For those of you that still don't know, she's going to the Army. Amber and I dropped the girls off to find a spot while we did a bit of shopping. It took us an HOUR AND A HALF to find parking again, but we did get to see some crazy watermelon man. When we finally found parking, we turned out to be like a mile away from the spot they found with a hundred pound cooler that we could NOT carry. We found some people nice enough to let us throw the cooler on their skateboard so we could pull it all the way to the place we were at. My arms were hell of tired. Rachelle was like two hours late, but it was okay because the whole thing was really fun. There was a red tide, and the water looked like diarrhea coffee tea. Before I left Fernando and I rode one of the new rides at Belmont Park and it was great. Then Angela picked me up to go see The Robot Ate Me. That is a whole other journal entry, that I will do soon. I will just say it was the best show I have EVER BEEN TO EVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. Considering some of the shows I've been to, that is saying a lot.

Sunday was the girl's night out. Amber and I met Jaimie, Rachelle, and Heather at the Euclid trolley station and we took it downtown and walked to Hooters. I got to be the navigator, and I am surprised I didn't fuck up and get us lost haha. But we met Jessica there, and ended up being served by my buddhist friend. The food was good and Rachelle ate like three courses in the time it took me to finish a sandwich. Jessica took off with Ben, and on the way back to the trolley we stopped in F. Street and played around with all the penises and vibrators and the awesome novelty stuff there. Every got little condom lollipops as souvenirs. The place was awesome. I think we are all going to find a porn shop every time we go out now. I really want to take them to the Crypt, which is a gay fetish store. We were going to go to the beach, but we decided to just go to a park instead. We consolidated cars and stopped at Memory Lane and tried to take pictures (none of which came out). We ended up at the park and swung some, and talked a lot. It was nice. Girls nights are always great.

On Monday, me, Hallie, Amber, Jesse, and Arjay went to see the War of the Worlds again. It was a lot of fun, everyone hanging out. Lots of joking, and drinking puckers in the movie theatre. I think Hallie got a little tipsy. We dropped Hal off and the four of us went to a Lemon Grove hill to watch the fireworks. Arjay was being a nerd and took a series of baseball pictures after sword fighting with Jesse with the huge stake. The guys disappeared after a while and left me and Amber watching about seventeen different sets of fireworks, it was awesome. I saw MarFar (holler) and Sam there and some of their friends. Afterward Amber and I picked up some McDs. A great way to end the Fourth of July weekend.

anatasia.army@gmail.com — Sun, 22 May 2005 10:51:10 GMT

http://www.fuckthesouth.com/

maybe minus some of the profanity, I'd like it a lot more, but it hits the nail on the head.